Our week of vacation :)

When I put all the pictures in here they were all out of order and I don't have the energy right now to rearrange them! Sorry! I will go through them all and walk you through our fabulous vacation!

Baby Ian was stretching while we were waiting for the dolphin show at Sea World to start. He spent most of the day sleeping in the sling so it was his chance to move those limbs around.

Picture opp right before the Shamu show. It was a super hot day!

This was when we first got to the park and were watching the baby dolphins. Ahhh, the shade!

It rained on us quite a few times throughout the week and we had planned more than once to do a campfire. This night it was thundering and raining pretty hard so John made a little fire in a pie pan and we did smores right outside the RV.

In the kitchen of the RV

The kids were throwing around a squishy lightbulb and Johnny threw it up at the perfect time!

Ian's first time in the pool! I didn't want to put sunscreen on him so he was in and out in about 3 minutes. he didn't really care for how bright it was anyways.

Look, a rare picture of a mommy! We were watching the baby dolphins....did you know baby dolphins nurse for 18m-2yrs about every 2-3 hours around the clock! Mama dolphins must be sleepy!

The boys

We didn't do the Magic Kingdom this trip but we still had to ride the monrail. It is easy to get to from the campgrounds and the view of the castle is still enough to excite the kids even if it is a drive by. We also got to see the night fireworks 2 nights in a row...the first night we watched from the boat dock at the campgrounds and the 2nd night from the front of the Contemporary resort across the street from thr park. They were still beautiful!

Johnny hugging Dale at the sing a long and campfire. madeline would have no part in taking a picture with him! Ava loved him!

Madeline eating a smore! I ate way too many of these while at the campgrounds (hence why I skipped my weigh in Monday morning!)

Johnny around the huge bonfire

Waiting for Chip and Dale's sing a long campfire to start. We were actually early for something and got good seats

Madeline (whom just had swim lessons as to why she is in a bathing suit!) and Ava showing off their tomatoes from their garden. They are so proud when they can finally pick some

John, his dad, and Johnny made a small baseball field in the backyard (theirs). Johnny had a blast hitting balls with them and is actually very good!

My little blue eyed butterball

Poor thing! We went over to a friend's house Sunday for a cook out and swimming and the kids were playing with the squishy hat thing. We had to try it on Ian! he didn't cry but it made his head heavy and hard to hold up! It was off right after the pictures were taken.

And another rare picture of me! This was the girls on the monorail. Our last day of vacation :(

2nd post in one day

Just need to write to get out some frustration.

Wanna try something just for kicks? Take 4 kids completely across town by yourself to go bathing suit shopping. Discover that while unloading said kids you have left your diaperbag at home with wallet,license, diapers, wipes, etc. Oh well, go inside to look around. All kids had serious naps so even though it is approaching 8 pm, you know they won't be sleeping anytime soon.

Walk around entire store looking for swimsuit section and see it only consists of 4 racks, completely picked over. Amazingly find 4 that might work,ha!

Now the really fun part...put 3 hyper kids plus one screaming clingy baby plus double stroller into a room 3 X 4 feet and strip down only to have 2 kids laugh at your exposed "boobies". Try to squeeze those "boobies" into the unknown of a bathing suit. Stand back and look at your 3 month post baby body with the biggest "boobies" ever squishing out of every side of too small top. Sigh.

Found one that might have worked but I felt old in it, it wasn't me even though it did cover all parts properly. Besides, had no money to pay for it.

Leave. Baby is already screaming and you have a 15 min ride home. 2 oldest already fighting in the rear. In all of this, all I can think about is money or lack there of and how crazy I must have been to think I could handle 4 kids and raise them to be healthy citizens, and pay for everything they want to do and basically just overwhelming the crap out of myself. I can't even fill the gas tank up anymore. I don't read the business section of the paper anymore. I don't ever watch the news anymore. The cost of food is outrageous especially when you feed your kids whole foods. I felt myself just sinking, trying to hold my head above water, struggling to breathe. Then this came on the radio and I had to turn it up too loud just so I could hear over all the noise:


'Cause I feel us drowning in a sea spilled from a cup
When there is no place safe and no safe place to put my head
When you feel the world shake from the words that are said

[Chorus:] And I'm calling all angels
I'm calling all you angels
I won't give up if you dont give up [Reapeat x4]

I need a sign to let me know you're here '
Cause my TV set just keeps it all from being clear
I want a reason for the way things have to be
I need a hand to help build up some kind of hope inside of me [

Chorus]

When children have to play inside so they don't disappear
And private eyes solve marriage lies cause we don't talk for years
And futbol teams are kissing Queens and losing sight of having dreams
In a world that what we want is only what we want until it's ours

[Chorus x2] Calling all you angels [Repeat till fade]
~Train "Calling All Angels"

Wow, I just need to go to bed. I just need a couple of minutes of quiet to pray, to get all this junk out of my head. I need to give thanks for all that I do have and replace my fears with faith. I am overwhelmed.

I read a sign today that I forgot about until just now, something to think about.
"Happiness is wanting what you get"

3 months old today!!!

He loves to hold onto blankets and burp cloths especially to chew on. He has started drooling like crazy too which I suspect is the starting of teeth. Yes, my kids have always gotten their first teeth early! Notice the cute dipples on his short chubby legs?

How about the love handles rolling over his diaper?

LOVE those rolls!

Daddy getting ready to go to work holding the chunky dunk.

Johnny lost his 2 front teeth at the same time!! Actually Ava knocked them out when they were wrestling around, they were pretty loose. He was very proud especially to get more money from the tooth fairy. He still kinda believes there is one, but I think he really knows it's us!

We are leaving for vacation on Monday and won't be back until Friday so no pictures/updates until then...and then I'll unload them all on you! Not too far from us, we are staying in an R.V. at Fort WIlderness...camping Disney style, no tents for us here! We have been probably 10+ times in the last 3 years and the kids just love it there. They do campfires every night with smores and songs with Chip and Dale and then they play a Disney movie outdoors on a big screen. We are right across from the pool which is great and then we take our bikes too and tour around. PLUS they have a marina where you can take the boat over to Disney or the Contempory hotel and we plan on watching the fireworks down there one night. We are not hitting the parks this trip because of money/crowds but we will go to SeaWorld one day because we have passes. We will be meeting a couple of our friends there too to spend the day together. I am super excited about this trip and especially because John will have 9 days off in a row, something he has never had before.

If I don't update again in the next couple of days, I'll see you next week ;)

Summer, summer, summertime

Ava started gymnastics at the YMCA on Saturday and had the best time. It is a parent/child class until they are 3 and I think she was the oldest in there and definately the best ;) She was very receptive to all the instruction the teacher gave her and she listened and did what the teacher said. She was very happy to be in there especially the pit.

And this is me post baby. I have lost 12 lbs already on weight watchers and have another 18 to go to be pre-Ian. Slowly but surely IT will come off!

Ava jumping the colors

Lauren (their cousin), Madeline, and Ava playing dress up like a princess. We went down to their house on Saturday for swimming and dinner. My kids loving going there esp. to swim since we don't have a pool. They all had a wonderful time and fell asleep on the way home (except for Ian who literally screamed the whole 25 minutes it took to get home)

All the kids lined up...Ava, twims Nick and Ryan, Johnny, Lauren, Ian, Madeline.....7 grandkids in 6 years!!!

Adding pictures

A bit creepy if you ask me but the girl's loved it!


Just a mid week pop in to add pictures. Tomorrow is J's last day of kindergarten so our summer will officially begin (and I hope keep us insanely busy!)

11 weeks

Wow! Am I blessed or what?!! Just look at these 4 amazing God given gifts that I can call my own! How lucky am I that they call me mom! Each one with their own amazing traits and personalities. Each one pure perfection.

I took a similar picture when Ava was about 3 months old and it is precious to me. Maybe I will scan it when I don't have a sleeping baby in my arms!

Here is my little man being silly today...he is such a smiler now and it just makes my heart burst when I see it. He was almost laughing!

"

Then Ava wanted to hold him and he kinda looks like he is asking "what's going on??" When he is observing his environment and looking around, his mouth is always open and his head is leaning forward...he is def. a thinker

And then he was happy and smiling again!

I have been blog surfing lately and have come across several that are heartwrenching and others that are joyful. In all of them is raw emotion of pain and/or joy, openess for all to see, beautiful words that come straight out of their soul. My blog seems so wordless compared to others. As usual, I compare myself and feel like I am not really opening up to the blog reading world, like I am just baseline...a little update, some pictures, and bam, I call it a week. Blah.

As it goes in my everyday world. A few words, a bit of conversation, and bam, I call it a day. My everyday emotions that the world sees are so baseline, so, blah. Always has been that way with the exception of one friend who I think really knew me as me. And then of course my husband whom I would like to think knows me well ;)

What is wrong that I can't open up, can't let the real me out? I am not an uptight person so why do I come across as such? Why can't I speak my mind, ask for help, be easy going?

I will reflect on this for a few days and let you know.

10 weeks

I forgot to update for 10 weeks! Here is baby Ian getting a bath and I am afraid this tub is in it's last days. you can see where his head hits and when he pushes his legs straight, he almost pushes himself out! He LOVES getting a bath, he is so interactive and smiley and happy in the tub. You can see all the medicine on the counter....almost $300 at the vet for our dog @@ Not happy about spending that money.
He is holding his head very well now but is still bobbing around trying to look at everything around him. The other kids love it when he smiles at them and he is doing it a lot more now. He is still very much a "hold me" baby and loves to cuddle. Of course he is a little more partial to me ;)
The girls love hearing themselves sing in the outside fan. I had to tell them to lower the volume when they were singing princess songs at 7:45 in the morning here.

M's last day of preschool was Friday and her teacher always has a pool party at her house. She asks the kids what they want to eat at the party and you can imagine what was there! Cheesy poofs, gummy bears and worms, oreos, chocolate cookies, chips, goldfish, candy, soda, and pizza! My kids were in heaven because you know I don't buy that junk for home!! But that's why she does it too, so they remember.

I am just kinda writing off this school year for her. She never once spoke to her teacher and very very rarely to any of the kids. She did learn in school, just not on any kind of social level, she just went backwards. In her mind, she loved school and has said many times that she will miss her friends a great deal so her perception of school vs. everyone elses is very different. If you are reading this and don't know, Madeline has Selective Mutism. She has severe anxiety when it comes to talking at school or to people she doesn't know. She is a brilliant child and I think has a lot more control on it than others want to believe which puts me in an awkward position as how to help her. I am hoping that a new school and new environment will be a nice fresh start for her where others don't know and she can be more at ease. This year it was too big of an issue and her teacher made too much of a deal out of it. I will talk with her teacher and hope she might be able to help us.

Anyways, holiday tomorrow and of course John is working. We are counting down the days until his 9 day vacation in June! I can't wait :) Not much going on this week, I am getting my first facial if that counts! And I am going to see some old friends on Wednesday from Le Leche whom I haven't seen in about a year. I am going to have to adjust to a new schedule now with having M home during the days but we should get into a new groove soon. J only has a week and a half left of school too.