11 weeks

Wow! Am I blessed or what?!! Just look at these 4 amazing God given gifts that I can call my own! How lucky am I that they call me mom! Each one with their own amazing traits and personalities. Each one pure perfection.

I took a similar picture when Ava was about 3 months old and it is precious to me. Maybe I will scan it when I don't have a sleeping baby in my arms!

Here is my little man being silly today...he is such a smiler now and it just makes my heart burst when I see it. He was almost laughing!

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Then Ava wanted to hold him and he kinda looks like he is asking "what's going on??" When he is observing his environment and looking around, his mouth is always open and his head is leaning forward...he is def. a thinker

And then he was happy and smiling again!

I have been blog surfing lately and have come across several that are heartwrenching and others that are joyful. In all of them is raw emotion of pain and/or joy, openess for all to see, beautiful words that come straight out of their soul. My blog seems so wordless compared to others. As usual, I compare myself and feel like I am not really opening up to the blog reading world, like I am just baseline...a little update, some pictures, and bam, I call it a week. Blah.

As it goes in my everyday world. A few words, a bit of conversation, and bam, I call it a day. My everyday emotions that the world sees are so baseline, so, blah. Always has been that way with the exception of one friend who I think really knew me as me. And then of course my husband whom I would like to think knows me well ;)

What is wrong that I can't open up, can't let the real me out? I am not an uptight person so why do I come across as such? Why can't I speak my mind, ask for help, be easy going?

I will reflect on this for a few days and let you know.